Monthly Archives: June 2011

in the eye of the beholder

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So imagine you get up the nerve to go on a dating site, sign up and reach out and hope for the best. Perhaps you are divorced, separated, widowed or too busy to meet people any other way.

You peruse the various sites to see what might suit your needs and wishes.There is a a dating site for everyone; people who are married who want to have an affair, people who are obese, people who eat a minimal amount, people who are Jewish, Mormon, Catholic, vegan,gay, transgendered, love animals, people who are rich, modest, into swapping and swinging and cross dressing, people who have fetishes, people who are kinky, people who are asexual. But perhaps the spookiest of all is the site for beautiful people (BeautifulPeople.com).

Try to imagine a person feeling their own beauty, finding courage and signing up with their very very best picture.

The members rank one another and the website will delete you if you are not voted beautiful enough.

It gets more sinister. Apparently a disgruntled past employee polluted the site with a virus which allowed some “ugly” or less than beautiful people onto their site.

The company quickly booted over 30,000 people  off the site because, as they put it, “We can’t just sweep 30,000 ugly people under the carpet” and apologized to the “unfortunate people who were wrongly admitted to the site and believed, albeit for a short time, that they were beautiful.”

We wouldn’t want that kind of anarchy.

Last year about 5,000 members were booted off for gaining weight over Christmas. The company founder unapologetically referred to them as “fatties”.

Let’s say you did not get voted off and got matched and went on that first date. Would both of you be arm wrestling for the seat at the restaurant facing the mirror?

(I just heard “beauty is in the eye of the beer holder”. Now that is funny)

what is in a name? I am trying to get mine back. Click here for details

IF

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Rudyard Kipling
If 

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise;If you can dream – and not make dreams your master;
If you can think – and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build ’em up with wornout tools;If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on”;If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings – nor lose the common touch;
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run –
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And – which is more – you’ll be a Man* my son!*person/woman

this poem is about strength and courage and doing what needs to be done and these are on our sexy list- click here to read the whole list

empty seat

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So I told you we were going to have a great time father’s day and we did.

My girls made me breakfast (homemade scones)

 

– yes I had to ask for it, yes I threw in a little guilt over the un- spectacular attention I received on Mother’s day

and served it in our pretty new backyard

then we took pizza, ice cream and cones and raspberry smoothies to my dad and ate lunch outside with him. I told him why I thought he was a great dad. I am not sure he caught any of it but I said it all out loud.

Then we went home and all had naps (this never happens). I took a 15 minute one on the couch with back door wide open and front door too (love this), listening to the buzz of lawnmowers and cars and birds, until a friend dropped by for lemonade. Oh lovely old fashioned Sunday afternoon. I had all the creases from the couch on my face while we drank it. She left. I went back to couch, impersonating dads everywhere again. BFF called. Two more friends dropped in  to wish me a happy father’s day  and I had to explain sleep creases on face and bed head.

Later we went out for an early dinner. We went to  a family club and sat outside. There were a few single dads there with their children but mainly it was a sea of families. This would have been hard for all of us several years ago.

But today we had a perfect time.

Girls were joking that maybe everyone thought we were mean because we had the empty seat and left dad at home. I said, smiling, that  we could say ” he just stepped away for a bit”. Daughter said –  ‘Well I would just say ‘give my mom a few years and the seat will be taken’.

I love being their dad.

Check out my other new post- so many shoes so little time- by clicking here. No it is not about shoes.