I went to visit my dad the other day and they happen to be celebrating Robbie Burns day. Some of these celebrations are hard to bear. The volunteers trying so hard and the crumpled bodies unenthused and their quiet and disconnection so loud and clear.
This event was quite animated actually. Some of the residents got dressed up in tartans and tams and there was a parade on the main floor. The woman in this picture, very dressed up, had the honour of presenting the Hagis.
Out of the corner of my eye I see an old friend pushing her dad in his wheelchair. I have not seen her in several years. We were friends, full of hope and excitement, when our babies were in diapers.
Now we reconnect. With our fathers in diapers. We both swallow hard at the poetry of it. Heads tilted, eyes filled, all pretence, pride and edge fall away.
I am the person who was broken when she filed for divorce. You told me I would feel better, which I so do in my new house with my own rules and no abuse. If I could just survive my mom’s hospice and unexpected leukemia diagnosis. Dementia progressing so fast…This woman is not the mom I knew, but I am in love with the new lady she has become. Prayers that I will survive this sad time.
Susan- thank you for writing and telling me you are feeling better. This sadness with our parents is pervasive and heavy. Enjoy her as much as you can now. It is truly the long goodbye.