This is worth repeating.
My dad had a vocabulary of his own. ( I know where I get this from) It is oddly ironic, definitely heartbreaking and constantly tearing away at his essence, that he has almost no words now. He always made up songs, jingles, rules and words that were uniquely his and if he couldn’t remember your name, he gave you a new one.
If you were dating me, thinking of dating me, wondering about dating me, of an age 20 years either side of my age, or just a man or boy with a pulse, he would give you a name other than yours. And if you liked your life, you answered to it.
He grew up with a man by the name of Rob Tooth. We heard about this guy forever. Did he exist? He did for us.
He became the fall guy for bad manners. My dad would say ” Rob Tooth had no couth” I have never heard anyone else ever use this word so I just looked it up because it occurred to me that he might have made it up because it rhymed. Nope. Webster says it means good manners; refinement.
We would laugh hysterically. The picture he painted for us was of a guy who would not shake your hand with a firm grip, would not look you in the eye, checked out every girl’s/woman’s butt in a leering never discreet way, read playboys in his attic for hours on end, never paid his debts, had no courage, licked his knife while he ate, spat in public, cheated on tests, was always late for dinner, chained smoked in the bushes, forgot to wear deodorant, had dirty fingernails, was rude to his parents, stood up for nothing but scrapped with anyone over anything.
I think he became a politician.
(this is re published from a post that first appeared October 2011)