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Tag Archives: dad knows best
stick- to -it -iveness
(I am reposting this one in honour of Father’s Day yesterday- hope all of you had a good one )
Because women love to talk and repeat themselves and then talk some more, the lessons from mom are very high in volume. So much so that they sometimes fade in importance, or the child is confused as to the origin and sometimes the point of the lesson. Dad, on the other hand, typically says fewer things, is around a little less and his lessons hold more weight maybe because they are not anchored by clean your room, brush your teeth and sit up straight.
A dad will teach you how to snap your fingers, whistle, whittle wood, make a fire, laugh at yourself, drink a beer, blame the dog when you pass gas, change a tire, ride a bike, do something every day that scares you and throw not like a girl.
My dad taught me how to listen, look people dead in the eye, keep my word, empathize with and cheer for the underdog, smoke a pipe, call a spade a spade to its face, give nicknames to people you care about, push, tease, ask for, and swim underwater for the whole length of the pool. But the thing he held in highest esteem was something he called ‘sticktoitiveness’. This is not giving up or giving in no matter how tough it gets. Once in a job that I could not make work, I took him out for lunch, presented the whole thing and basically asked permission to give up.
Later when I had to give up on my marriage, stick- to- it -iveness made me stay and try until it almost killed me. However, I never need to wonder if I did everything I could. I cannot regret or think I gave up too easily.
At that point, I could not discuss it intelligently with my father as he was already in the later stages of Dementia. One day recently he watched me intently as I was writing this blog and he asked what I was writing about. I told him separation and divorce. He said ” Oh my, I do not want to get divorced”. I said ‘you won’t dad but I am’. He said “It must have been very hard for you to give up.”
At my wedding, my father turned to my brand new husband and said quietly “You are going to love living with her.” Of all the things he ever said about me or to me this was the very highest compliment.
Happy Father’s Day, dad. I loved living with you too.
Are you Lucky? Check out my latest blog post on Urbanmoms- I think you will like it.
stick- to -it -iveness
Because women love to talk and repeat themselves and then talk some more, the lessons from mom are very high in volume. So much so that they sometimes fade in importance, or the child is confused as to the origin and sometimes the point of the lesson. Dad, on the other hand, typically says fewer things, is around a little less and his lessons hold more weight maybe because they are not anchored by clean your room, brush your teeth and sit up straight.
A dad will teach you how to snap your fingers, whistle, whittle wood, make a fire, laugh at yourself, drink a beer, blame the dog when you pass gas, change a tire, ride a bike, do something every day that scares you and throw not like a girl.
My dad taught me how to listen, look people dead in the eye, keep my word, empathize with and cheer for the underdog, smoke a pipe, call a spade a spade to its face, give nicknames to people you care about, push, tease, ask for, and swim underwater for the whole length of the pool. But the thing he held in highest esteem was something he called ‘sticktoitiveness’. This is not giving up or giving in no matter how tough it gets. Once in a job that I could not make work, I took him out for lunch, presented the whole thing and basically asked permission to give up.
Later when I had to give up on my marriage, stick- to- it -iveness made me stay and try until it almost killed me. However, I never need to wonder if I did everything I could. I cannot regret or think I gave up too easily.
At that point, I could not discuss it intelligently with my father as he was already in the later stages of Dementia. One day recently he watched me intently as I was writing this blog and he asked what I was writing about. I told him separation and divorce. He said ” Oh my, I do not want to get divorced”. I said ‘you won’t dad but I am’. He said “It must have been very hard for you to give up.”
At my wedding, my father turned to my brand new husband and said quietly “You are going to love living with her.” Of all the things he ever said about me or to me this was the very highest compliment.
Happy Father’s Day, dad. I loved living with you too.
Are you Lucky? Check out my latest blog post on Urbanmoms- I think you will like it.