If you have ever been divorced or had one of those big life things go very sour- you will beat yourself up for a long time over the “failure” of it, the heartbreaking sadness of it, the pervasive darkness of it and the soul crushing-rear -view- mirror -speculation of who, what, when, where and why of it.
Finally one day you will say out loud “I made a mistake”. And that is it. And it is human and okay. And you choose to employ all the beautiful learning that comes from mistakes.