Remember the 8 ball when we were kids? You could shake it and ask it anything and it was just so magical. Ok it was a crock but we want to believe what we want to believe.
When I was growing up my dad was a tough customer. We used to say we were only as good as our last sale. Big picture we were loved. Day to day though we were told ” not bloody good enough” . Sometimes with a smile and a laugh but the message was clear.
Don’t put your feet up.
Now it is funny to see how age and Dementia have mellowed him. He is so wowed by everything I do and am. He went for a ride in my car the other day and as he was getting in he asked whose car it was. He could not believe it was mine.(honestly it is a nothing car) I told him that women got the vote and that there was a sexual revolution and that I had a chequebook too. We laughed quite a bit. But the message was clear.
He is impressed with everything we do now.
My whole life I have sought out his advice. He was always a great listener and an incredibly wise and steady guy. He had great instincts. He never ever told me what I wanted to hear. He always asked the hard questions.
Now I still go to him for advice. Only now he is like the 8 Ball. His answers are simple and to the point. He can’t ask me much back. He tells me “you are perfect” and “I love you” over and over. Let’s face it – these are always the best answers to any question.
I was wrestling with something recently but never voiced it with him . Nonetheless, out of the silence he said “You should not settle for anything less than the best, Nance”.
Magic.