I remember reading once about a woman who said she loved to look down at her own hands and see the beautiful manicure, that it made her feel that everything was right in the world, even if it was not.
I love to look down at my hands and see the paint and the glue and the dye. I like to think about where they have been all day and what they have done. I love to feel useful and that I have been involved in something creative.
The notion of a bucket list became popular with the movie of the same name starring Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman. The premise is a good one- what would you do if you only had a half year or less to live? From this came the making of one’s “bucket list” and more importantly the executing of all things on that list.
Having been through a “life change” as a divorced friend of mine puts it, we are offered a blank slate (and a broken slate and a crippling slate and a shattered slate, as side dishes) that might allow us to start over with all the eventual clarity but none of the morbid finality of a terminal illness.
Once over the difficult transition, it might seem like a good time to start a bucket list and to get on with it.
How do we arrive at this list and then how do we strike things off?
Arriving at the list is easier than you think. You will not be given a grade; there are no mistakes, so check your inhibitions at the door. Forget the teacher who said you couldn’t or what your mom wanted for you or what your neighbour makes you feel you should want. Carry a little book, or have a file on your PDA for jotting down stuff it would break your heart not to do. Make sure there is a notepad beside your bed as ideas will come to you in your sleep.
Equally important to what you love doing is what you do not want to do- Knowing what you don’t want helps to define what you do want. This may include not being alone or conversely, never marrying again, having a home by the sea, never having one in a sub division, writing a book or never book keeping. It may include getting back with an old boyfriend or never getting back with your ex wife. It might be simple like eating better or cooking more. It might be dramatic like losing half your body weight or overcoming a fear.
the bones of the bucket list-
1.the list shapes easily with headings-work,play,relationships/family,dough,faith,physical and random.
2. the list must be be specific-if it isn’t clear it can’t be realized.
3. the list needs stepping stones-critical path is needed to acheive items on bucket list
4. the list needs support– enlist encouragers-you need specific people to help you get there.
5.Remember bucket list mantra is one step at a time. A list is pretty but striking the list is magnificent.
The most important thing I can say about this is write it down. This commits it to memory and if you look to it frequently it will be realised. I had a list a few years ago and recently came across it to find all of it had been achieved. It is either magic or the list was too easy.
Time for a new bucket list.
want more bucket list?click here for new urbanmoms post on this same theme
It has been over 15 years since I have been on a business trip.I finished work on a Friday at 8 in the evening and had my first baby that Monday. I used to spend three months a year in New York in beautiful clothing(clothing allowance provided), working in an architectural marvel at 5th and 52nd in the top 5 floors, with delicious and generous per diems and hotel rooms in the theatre district with famous cool people milling about.
The fact that we got paid peanuts did not matter too much for a while. The fact that we often sat around boardroom tables with designers and sales people until 4 in the morning debating earnestly and with vigour whether we should call ‘beige’- wheat, biscuit or flax that year only became truly hilarious to me when I was pregnant.
I had every intention of going back to work. Until I gave birth. Return dates loomed like a guillotine. Simply could not do it. They might not have taken me anyway- I was so crazy in love with my daughter, spoke in monosyllables only -maybe even with a baby voice-wiped everyones’ chins(adults included), moved their dinner plates closer to them and wore only clothes I could sleep in if I got an opportunity.
I was a shadow of my former self. Deliriously happy and stupid.
Never went back. Never missed the brain time, the business trips, the clothes. Never looked back. I ended up with work that was the antithesis of glamour –teaching art to children . Now I am looking forward to my first ‘business’ trip in all that time. It is a Blogfest in Collingwood with many of my fellow bloggers at Urbanmoms. There are many of us going in cars provided by Ford, staying at the Westin, with delicious meals, fantastic activities like yoga on the docks, and drinks here and there . I get to cover a trip to my favourite spa there and play 9 holes of golf. Afterwards I am going to tell you all about it so you can feel you were with us or even check out some of it for yourselves.
Business cards have been printed for us and we had to choose a picture that best represents where we are/who we are. Mine is above. We call that picture laughing girls.
There will be no budgets to review, no sexual harassment (darn), no boring meetings, no lofty sales figures to surpass, no 4 am meetings regarding nonsense.
Can’t wait.
ever had the exam dream? check out my scary dream scenario on my other blog-by clicking here